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Walay Lingaw
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Number of posts : 211
Age : 36
Registration date : 2007-09-24

PostSubject: happy time   Mon Sep 24, 2007 12:10 pm

Husband came home from church, suddenly lifted his wife and carried her.
Wife: Why? Did the Pastor tell you to be romantic like this?
Husband: No! He told me to carry my cross!

Friend: "Wow, pare, ganda ng sapatos mo, ah!"
Husband: "Oo. Surprise gift ng kumare mo!"
Friend: "Surprise? Ano occassion?"
Husband: "Wala. Nakita ko na lang sa ilalim ng kama namin kagabi!"

Health Advisory: "Beer contains female hormones, and can turn men into women.
After 5 pints.... men become talkative, unreasonable, irritable, cry for nothing, and urinate while sitting!"

WIFE: I'm warning you! Parating na husband ko in 1 hour!
HANDSOME VISITOR: Wala naman akong ginawang masama ah?
WIFE: kaya nga! kung may balak ka, GAWIN MONA!!!

WIFE: Himala! aga mong umuwi ngayon.
HUSBAND: Sunod ko lang utos ng boss ko. Sabi nya "GO TO
HELL", kaya ito uwi agad ako..

Wife: Lab, may taning na ang buhay ko. Huling gabi ko na to, let's make love.
Husband: Heh! tumigil ka nga. Maaga pa akong gigising bukas, buti ikaw, hindi na.


Population policies of countries:
China : Stop at 1 child.
Singapore : Stop at 2 children
Phil: STOP AT 4 A.M.!

RUSSIAN: we're 1st in space
USA : we're 1st in the moon
ERAP: we'll be the 1st in the sun
USA : you can't go there, you'll burn
ERAP: we're not stupid, we'll go there at NIGHT!

Ano kadalasan ang sinasabi kapag nautot?
American: Excuse me.
British: Pardon me.
Pinoy: NOT ME!


"SUMPA"
Hindi na makakatikim ng napakasarap na 'Sex' ang huling bumasa nito!
Ayos safe na ako...papayag ka bang IKAW ang huling babasa nito?
hehehe!!!
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xtemplar
Walay Lingaw
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Number of posts : 211
Age : 36
Registration date : 2007-09-24

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Mon Sep 24, 2007 12:11 pm

Subject: BASAHIN, TUMAWA at HIGIT SA LAHAT-IPASA!

Street Vendor : "bili na kayo ng relo! gold watch ito! pag namuti, white gold! pag huminto stopwatch!"

gf : hu hu hu hu bakit natin ginawa ito? hindi na ako virgin at dalawang beses pa natin ginawa!
bf : ano? isa lang ah?!
gf : bakit, hindi na ba natin uulitin mamaya?!

Couple talking:
wife : hon, paki fix naman ilaw sa labas.
husband : hello!? electrician ba ako?
wife : eh di pkigawa na lang hagdan natin.
husband : hello!? karpintero ba ako?
umalis c husband, pagbalik gawa na lahat ng sira sa bahay. tinanong niya wife kung sino gumawa ng trabaho.
wife : kasi kanina a man saw me crying, sabi ko dami sira dito sa bahay. so he offered to help in exhange of either sex or bake ako ng cake.
husband : so pnag-bake mo siya ng cake?
wife : hello?! baker ba ako?!

ANG MARRIED LIFE....
May isang intsik na sa sobrang hilig sa karaoke ay inabot ng 5 am.
Dahil sa takot mabugbog ni misis, nag-text ng:
"HUWAG KA BAYAD RANSOM. NAKATAKAS AKO. UWI NA KO!"

Husband: "Paratina lang tayo away! Maghiwalay na lang tayo!"
Wife: "Sige, maghati tayo ng mga anak!"
Husband: "Akin ang mga guwapo at maganda!"
Wife: "Sus! Pinili pa yung hindi kanya!"

Sa harap ng nursery window;
Friend: Pare, pag laki ng anak mo, am sure magaling mag-drive
Dad: Bakit, pare, malaki ba ang kamay?
Friend: Hindi. Kasi kamukha siya ng driver ninyo!
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Walay Lingaw
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Number of posts : 211
Age : 36
Registration date : 2007-09-24

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Mon Sep 24, 2007 4:21 pm

Very Happy Very Happy

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moongk
Gamay Sweldo


Number of posts : 24
Registration date : 2007-09-25

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Wed Sep 26, 2007 12:30 pm

hehehehe... amusing!
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lrdblz
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Number of posts : 8
Registration date : 2007-09-25

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Tue Mar 04, 2008 2:59 pm

testing.... anong joke ang di nakakatawa.... ?
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lrdblz
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Number of posts : 8
Registration date : 2007-09-25

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Tue Mar 04, 2008 3:06 pm

LALAKI: Sweetie, Pwede ko bang ipasok
ang aking pag-ibig sa butas ng iyong pagmamahal?

BABAE: Sobra ka naman manligaw,
Salita pa lang Nakakabuntis ka na
ng Damdamin..

===========================
JR: akong klasmeyt tay dalu kau..

TATAY: Ngano man dong?

JR: Wa gyud ko imbitaha paglubong sa iyang papa, kaon na unta ko baboy!

Aw, dili sad naku xa imbitaron sa imo lubong tay!!

====================================
BOARDING HOUSE...

TAGALOG: Hoy, wag nga kayong
mag ingay jan sa baba, may naga upa dito sa taas,

BISAYA: Ah! pag upa mog inyo diha
kay mag jerjer sad mig amo dre...

==================================
Lovers Making LOVE:

GF: Lam mo babe, kaw lang nagpa kama sakin..

BF: Swerte ko naman..

GF: OO Naman
Kc yung Iba, sa SALA..KUSINA...LABABO...
KUBETA..KULUNGAN...DAMUHAN.. &
madami pa...

======================================================

Sa buhay hindi mahalaga
kung anong meron ka...

at kung anong narating mo..

ang mahalaga may diyos
kang kasama..

at may....

UYAB KANG PERTENG HUBAGA...

================================
Lovers Making LOVE:

GF: Lam mo babe, kaw lang nagpa kama sakin..

BF: Swerte ko naman..

GF: OO Naman
Kc yung Iba, sa SALA..KUSINA...LABABO...
KUBETA..KULUNGAN...DAMUHAN.. &
madami pa...
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lrdblz
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Registration date : 2007-09-25

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Tue Mar 04, 2008 3:07 pm

OA ra?

Still have more...
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lrdblz
Permi Hatagan Trabaho


Number of posts : 8
Registration date : 2007-09-25

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Tue Mar 04, 2008 3:10 pm

PULIS 1: Pre, alam mo na ba
ang usap - usapan?

PULIS 2: Bakit Pre?? Anong Balita?

PULIS 1: May bading daw sa Campo natin?

PULIS 2: Sino daw Pre?

PULIS 1: Kiss muna ..

=============================
At Mid-night while Having SEX..

BANA: Ahhh...yehh..hapit na ko.. dalia na..

WIFE: Ahh! Hulata ko..Dungan Ta!

(anak nakamata ug naka dungog..nahadlok!)

ANAK: Ma.. Pa... Asa Mo?? Kuyog Ko!!

=======================================
Dalawang Taga-Bundok
sumakay sa Elevator..

DORIO: Magkano ibabayad natin??

DOMENG: Tanga! Bobo! Gago! Ignorante! Bugok! Istupido!

Bakit ka magbabayad e wala pa tayong TICKET!

================================
MAMA: Iha, ayaw ug pag-uli ug dugay ha?
mga lalaki baya imo kuyog..

ANAK: Ayaw kahadlok ma..
SEMINARIANS man sila..

MAMA: "Ayaw kalimot! Imong Amahan Obispo.."

=================================
AMO: Inday, mora gani'g ning dako
na imong tiyan..??

INDAY: Kanser baya ni Maam..

AMO: Ha?? Unsa??? May Kanser Ka??

MAID: Wa..uyy! Kan SIR ni bah.. HALEER!

====================================
BOY: Mahal Kita.. i LOVE you
Bisan LINOG ug BAGYO
adtoon tika sa Inyo..

GIRL: Wala man lagi ka nag adto Gabie??

BOY: Kay Kuan...Kay TALIGSIK ra man to ..

=================================
A Guy Donated Blood to his Girlfriend..

When They Broke Up...

He Wanted His Blood Back!

The Girl Threw A Bloody Napkin
at him & Said:

" iLL paY you In Monthly Installments"

=================================
ABOGADO: Tinuod ba nga ikaw
nagkawat sa ALAHAS..TV..KWARTA
CD PLAYER..ETC..??

AKUSADO: Angkonon naku tanan
you hono!!r..

Apan wala gyod ko maghilabot sa ETCHETERA...
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lrdblz
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Number of posts : 8
Registration date : 2007-09-25

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Tue Mar 04, 2008 3:11 pm

80 % of Men & Women
Masturbate when taking a BATH...

The remaining 20% just sing..

QUESTION: What is the title of The Song?

Di Mo Alam Noh?.......

Sabi na Nga Ba Kasali ka sa 80%...
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lrdblz
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Registration date : 2007-09-25

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Tue Mar 04, 2008 3:14 pm

A Lady Passenger In A Jeep
was Sleeping with a Breast Exposed..

Another Passenger woke her Up & Said:
"Dede Nyo Nakalabas"

The Lady Shouted:
" Diyos Ko..Nasaan Anak Ko??

=====================================
Nanay: Kumusta Date mo anak?
Effective ba payo ko
maglagay ng SILI LABUYO sa Suso
mo para di galawin ng BF mo?

ANAK: Hayy!! naku nay, PALPAK..
BICOLANO Bf Ko.. GANADO...

=================================
Bungi Gitahi sa Doctor
Tapos Gitistingan
pa pronounce.

DOCTOR: Cge e pronounce daw
LUZON VISAYAS MINDANAO,

BUNGI: LUKOT , PASAYAN, BULINAO.

DOCTOR: naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
MITAMOOT....
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Walay Lingaw
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Number of posts : 211
Age : 36
Registration date : 2007-09-24

PostSubject: Re: happy time   Thu Mar 06, 2008 1:46 pm

maayo.. heheheh...

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